'Tales That Start With A Whisper' - A Review

A brilliant show called Metal Evolution did an interview with Dave Mustaine, asking the Megadeth guitarist and vocalist if he still considered his band to be a 'thrash metal' band. Mustaine's reply was in the affirmative. Megadeth are a thrash metal band, he said, but we're also so much more.

The Thirteen Shots are a horror punk band. But they are so much more. Rising from the darkness to give the ancient genre of horror punk a kick up the skeletal backside, their début album, Vaudeville, gained rave reviews from all corners of the alternative music scene, including the legend that is Michale Graves (and if you don't know who he is, leave the hall. Now!).

A year later, The Thirteen Shots have released their follow-up to the 8-track attack that was Vaudeville, beautifully titled Tales That Start With a Whisper. It's a brilliant album. It's a horror punk album. And it's so much more...

The opening track, 'Death Jam 2000', kicks off with hoards of cheering fans and a grand announcement, before the music kicks off. It's a seriously catchy song, combining horror punk with 1960's rock and roll, and dare I say it, the tiniest hint of heavy metal. A fast-paced rocker that is short in length and directly acknowledges the band itself – We could be talking 'Death Jam 2000' or 'We Are Motorhead' here. Izzy's guitar really powers this tune, with a delicious driving riff. The Thirteen Shots grab you by the balls from track 1, and they don't let go!

'Zombies From The USSR' is a bonkers tune, the catchy garage-rock music backed up with some splendidly silly lyrics. It was a good choice as the album's big single, and the music video that accompanies it is brilliant too. Let's face it, we all love zombies, don't we?

'Bewitched' is a straight-up horror punk song, with a heavy bass sound courtesy of 'GMT', and frantic drumming from the ever-brilliant Chelsea. The riff, the chorus, and Johnny Rose's howling vocals invoke classic Blitzkid, with a nice Thirteen Shots twist, and a haunting dose of Gothic. 'Bewitched' is definitely a stand-out song for me, and belongs in any essential horror punk play-list.

'Psycho Jukebox' kicks things up a notch, returning to the cheeky, tongue-in-cheek swinging grooves of some of the Thirteen Shots' earlier work, combing swinging garage-rock, rock and roll, and even a dose of indie! This song should be played in every horror-punk and Goth club, at every Halloween party and event, so catchy and upbeat is it. This is the sound of a band who are having a blast, and you're invited along to their insane shenanigans! A song to dance to, and maybe kill to, as well!

'Get In My Crypt' has a heavy main riff that instantly brings to mine Graves-era Misfits...and then it all goes crazy. Just when you think you have a handle on the record, it throws you in a totally different direction. Heavier than 'Psycho Jukebox', but less melancholy than 'Bewitched', 'Get In My Crypt' is an ode to living it up on the dark side. Paying tribute to Zombina, Dracula, Zombies and all things that go bump in the night, this is a battle-cry for Horror Punks everywhere. The song also has a KILLER guitar solo, and delightful backing-vocals, and it's a wonder how any band could pack so much into two minutes and thirty-four seconds. But they pull it off admirably. Another stand-out track, another one for that 'Essential Horror Punk Play-List' I was talking about earlier.

'Nekro-Sexual' is groovy, groovy song. The lyrics are hilarious, and Johnny Rose is once again on fire here. Riffs, solos, pounding drums, and bone-shaking bass, 'Nekro-Sexual's cry of “Stomp on my balls!” will lodge itself into your head, and you will humming the tune for weeks. This album really does lay it on heavy, all killer, no filler. Fast songs, slower songs, heavy songs, softer songs, but the variety really brings it to life. Or un-life. Or [INSERT UN-DEAD PUN HERE]. You know what I mean.

I have been reviewing this album in track-list order. The final studio track of the album, 'Tales That Start With A Whisper', is more than just a beautiful title. The catchy riff (this album is chock-full of them), the Wednesday 13-esque tongue-in-cheek lyrics, the fist-pumping chorus...As you listen to the album, you choose a favourite song. And then you hear another, and you change your mind. And then you reach the end of the record and hear the title track, and you realise that the awesomeness never ends. A glorious song about the state of Vampires today, a serious issue for us proper horror fans, 'Tales That Start With A Whisper' is simply incredible. As mentioned earlier, Johnny Rose is letting out his inner Wednesday 13 where the lyrics are concerned (“They're horny old men searching for a fuck!”), but although the Thirteen Shots' influences are clear, they have their own identity, an identity that has evolved through the course of two brilliant albums and endless touring. 'Tales That Start With A Whisper', the song and the album, is a clear statement of who the Thirteen Shots are. Talented, original, and full of surprises, and more than capable of creating a record that never disappoints.

'Tales The Start With A Whisper' is a must-buy for any serious horror-punk fan, any metalhead with a love for horror, anyone really who is looking for a good time. Lyrically fantastic, musically flawless, and vocally deranged, this is one record you will want to take with you to the grave. In an age where horror punk has become rather stale and predictable, the Thirteen Shots have injected new life into this Frankenstein Monster of a genre.

The Thirteen Shots are a horror punk band. But my God, they are so much more!

STANDOUT TRACKS:

- Death Jam 2000

- Bewitched

- Get In My Crypt

- Nekro-Sexual

-Tales That Start With A Whisper

THE BAND:

Johnny Rose – Vocals

Izzy – Guitar/Backing Vocals

GMT – Bass

Chelsea - Drums

FOR FANS OF:
Raizing Hell, The Misfits, Wednesday 13, Astrovamps, Blitzkid, The Creepshow

For more from the Thirteen Shots:
www.thirteenshots.co.uk
http://horror-punks.com/profile/ThirteenShots
www.twitter.com/thirteenshotsuk

In The Sight of God - A Short Story

• Title: In The Sight of God
• Author: Cory John Eadson
• eBook: Yes

It was as if the world wasn't ending.

The Church hall glistened in the sunlight, golden rays beaming proudly through the grand arch windows. Assorted guests chattered excitedly in the polished pews, the only clue to recent catastrophes expressed by the slightly torn and tattered state of their clothes.

Hurst stood at the front of the hall before the Reverend and his stand, his head held high and proud as he gazed out at the clear blue sky. Reverend Bradshaw admired the man's courage, his bravery, and his presentation. Apart from a tiny bruise above his left eye, and a hint of stubble, Hurst looked immaculate. His black suit had neither a tear or a scuff on it, and the silver ring sitting in the palm of his right hand was as smooth and pure as the love that it embodied.

And, perhaps, the loss.

It was tradition for the best man to hold the ring, but Jake hadn't made it. In the comforting warmth of the Church Hall, Hurst thought about his late friend. Despite everything, Jake had made sure Hurst had got the ring on time, sacrificed everything for the sake of his friends' happiness. His final act of friendship would never be forgotten.

It was the absence of Jake, and the distant, constant moans and screams from outside that reminded everybody in the Church of what was happening out there in the world. But everything else was perfect. As stupid as it seemed, Hurst was almost grateful.

His wandering thoughts died away with the chatter of the guests, as the great wooden doors creaked open from behind them.

Hursts' mouth dropped open at the sight of his bride-to-be as she ended the grand hall. Her dress was as white as snow, undamaged and pure, and in hiding her feet, it gave the impression that she was gliding down the aisle. Her blonde hair shone like it was magic, and her beaming smile defied the faraway sounds of chaos from the world beyond.

As Elena floated down the aisle, Hurst noted the bouquet of vivid red roses clutched tightly to her chest. How hard they must have been to find, with the country as it was. Impossible, and beautiful. His stomach was a knot of nerves and excitement, and as Elena reached his side, he noticed her giggling. He realised it was because he was drooling, and he awkwardly wiped his mouth on his sleeve, turning a shade redder than the roses she held in her dainty hands.

Reverend Bradshaw cleared his throat, ready to begin the service. It had been agreed by everyone that the vows and ceremony would be shortened, so that everybody could move on as swiftly as possible. As he began, a wave of relief and genuine happiness washed over Hurst.

“We are gathered here today, in the sight of God, and in the face of family and friends, to join together Elena and Hurst in holy matrimony.”

Hurst took a moment to gaze around at the assembled masses who had managed to make it. Family and friends, determined to support he and Elena and maintain the traditional British stiff-upper lip, even if the world outside had gone to Hell. They'd all been through so much, lost so much, yet here they were...A tear blossomed in the corner of his eye, and he turned back to Elena.

The Reverend continued.

“Do you, Elena, take Hurst to be your lawful, wedded husband?”

“I do,” she replied, her emerald eyes flashing with love.

“And do you, Hurst, take Elena to be your lawful, wedded wife?”

There was a sudden creaking crash as the heavy church doors burst open again, tearing up the calm atmosphere. The guests screamed in their pews at the ungodly sight in the doorway, at the shuffling beast that had found its' way into the building. The creatures' dead, pupil-less eyes surveyed the scene around it, two grey arms outstretched as a rasping groan gurgled out from between a pair of rotting lips.

In a heartbeat, Hurst whipped out a handgun from the inside pocket of his suit, and blasted the creature right between the eyes. It fell dead to the ground, and a pair of men who had been standing by the doors hurriedly tossed the corpse outside.

After the ringing blast of the gunshot faded away, the guests broke out into a round of applause and cheers. Hurst smiled, and stared right back into the eyes of his beloved.

He stuffed the gun back into his pocket, and slipped the silver ring onto one of Elena's soft, beautiful fingers.

“I do,” he said, the tears in her eyes matching his own, as they embraced.

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WEDDING TOAST: For Anna and Michael, may you have a magical wedding and a happy, exciting future together! All the best, Cory John Eadson (aka @Evermore_Evil)


JOIN THE Dark Fairy Queen Writerly Bridal Shower HERE:

http://www.inlinkz.com/wpview.php?id=261381

Rest in Peace, James Herbert

Rest In Peace, James Herbert. An expert of crafting pulpy horror, like a British Steven King, with one foot in the gory B-Movie tradition. A master of the macabre, who many have imitated, but never bettered.

69 is no age to pass away, and so soon after the beautiful drama 'The Secret of Crickley Hall', based on his novel, and the massive success he had with 'Ash'. But James Herbert has left behind a legacy of horror, and he will continue to terrify generations to come.


Thank you for the fear!

James Herbert, 1943-2013

Lovely Quote

Readers of Doctor Who Magazine will have no doubt, over the last two months, relished the excellent interview with Jon Pertwee, recorded 18 years ago but never shown in its entirety until now. The final part of the interview concludes with this inspiring message from a man who was a hero to millions. Such a beautiful quote, and so very Jon Pertwee...

"Here is a bit of advice. Don't be afraid to stand out. Don't be afraid to be memorable. Do it by being someone people can depend on, by being profressional, but don't be afraid to be yourself and make your mark. You do not have to conform. Getting a strong reputation and being someone people remember will do you more good - whatever your profession - than anything else. When people you have known or who have worked with move up the industry, them remembering you will do you more favours and provide more opportunities than anything else. Be a good chap - but be a good chap they remember. That is the trick!"

Amen, Mr Pertwee. Amen!

 

 

ICONS: Patrick Troughton

Ben: The Doctor always wore this. If you are him it should fit... That settles it!

The Doctor: I'd like to see a butterfly fit into a chrysalis case after it spreads its wings.

Polly: Then you did change.

The Doctor: Life depends on change, and renewal.

 

William Hartnell played the First Doctor, from 1963 – 1966. He was an incredible actor, bringing us a perfect Doctor right at the very beginning of his adventures. In those mysterious, black and white days, Hartnell created a Doctor of mystery and intrigue, a fighter of evil, and a man even capable of falling in love. Every element of each Doctor since Hartnell was done by him first, whether to a larger or smaller extent. He set the standard, and was always going to be a tough act to follow.

 

When William Hartnell decided to leave the show, back in 1966, the BBC had a number of options when replacing him. They could get a Hartnell look-a-like to carry on the show, or even cast a widely different actor in the role but still pretend he's the same bloke. Either of these safe, mundane choices could have cost the show its next 47 years on television. Luckily, cleverly, they did something never before attempted in a series. They made the change of actor a part of the shows' mythology! Viewers would see the Doctor physically change into a different man. Even James Bond could never have done that (and this was even before the Bond films had changed their leading man at all)!

 

The idea of regeneration, or 'renewal', as it was then termed, was a brilliant idea, and the perfect 'get-out clause' for a show that needed to swap its star. But never one to rest on their laurels, the producers, having changed William Hartnell into newcomer Patrick Troughton, decided to leave the audience in some doubt over the new chap for a while. A brave, daring choice that added new spice to a show that had been on air for 3 years already.

 

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Part one of 'Power of the Daleks' is terrifying. Alien, claustrophobic, mysterious. A hot planet with mercury swamps, murderous humans double-crossing each other, and a deadly capsule containing the dreaded Daleks.

 

But the scariest thing about this story, the first episode in particular, is Patrick Troughton in his début adventure. Once he has taken over from Hartnell, his Doctor starts to act a bit oddly (what we now refer to as 'post-regenerative trauma'). But more than that, he's dangerous with it. The fiendish laugh Troughton gives near the episodes' beginning is absolutely terrifying, and that, combined with his choosing to speak of 'the Doctor' in third person, almost leads the audience to think that maybe some evil alien imposter has hijacked the Doctor's body....

 

In his first ever episode, the Second Doctor also gets his trusty recorder. Now seen as a whimsical, Troughton-esque quirk, in 'Power of the Daleks', its presence is almost chilling. Although 'Power...' no longer exists on film, the images conjured up by the audio track of this strange new man dancing around the TARDIS, playing his instrument, are disturbing, child-like and sinister. Perhaps the audio-only aspect adds to the atmosphere of this unusual piper – strutting about like a jester from the Devil's Court. The undertones are subtle, though, quietly sowing seeds of doubt and fear, unlike the blatant insanity of the misjudged 'The Twin Dilemma'.

Once the Doctor leaves the TARDIS to explore, however, the sinister elements slowly fade from his character; the old, Hartnell heroism slowly taking over. From rushing to the aid of a man who has just been shot, to giving his companion Ben a reassuring wink, we soon start to feel a bit safer around this renewed man.

 

Polly warms to the Doctor faster than Ben, who finds the lack of information on the Doctors' change of appearance (not to mention his constant tooting on the recorder) massively frustrating. But the stubbornness is just a front. The game-playing and silliness are just façades Troughtons' Doctor hides behind, and they quickly crumble away once his fear begins to creep through. His fear when stumbling upon his mortal enemies...

 

As Part 1 draws to a close, the audience starts to warm toward this new Doctor, accept him. What better way to cement his status as the new Doctor, then, than have him come face-to-face with his oldest and deadliest enemies? And even more so, to have the Daleks recognise him?

 

'Power of the Daleks' is an amazing story, with a game-changing first episode. Throughout the six-part adventure, Patrick Troughton gave us a glimpse of the many facets of his Doctor's character – the whimsical child, the cosmic hobo, the dark manipulator, the fighter of evil – and these would develop over the next three years, before becoming staples of many future Doctors.

 

By refusing to go down the obvious route, Patrick Troughton not only gave us a brilliant and influential Doctor, but he also gave our beloved show immortality. William Hartnell was excellent, of course, but without the concept of regeneration, the series could not have continued. And the regeneration would have counted for nothing, if the right man hadn't been chosen to continue where William Hartnell left off.

 

50 years of Doctor Who. We owe it all to Patrick Troughton.

 

 For more on the Troughton era:

- A New Discovery of Old

- Season 6B

 

 

 

 

A New Discovery of Old - Guest Post -

The new discovery of an old era by Neil Baird

 

When Doctor Who was only on TV via UK Gold, I watched the series constantly and barring certain stories such as the Dalek serials, saw from Tom Baker's first to Sylvester McCoy's last several times. This was the time when I became a true fan of the series.

Then after many, many months, Jon Pertwee's era was added to the run. I was delighted. Another part of Who's long history was opened up to me. But I always knew there was an era of this wonderful show that was denied to me and that was the black and white era of Doctor Who.

 

Those years of William Hartnell and Patrick Troughton were, to me, never to be seen. Due to the sadly many missing episodes/stories, and the haphazard continuity showing the surviving stories would cause, the Hartnell and Troughton stories were rarely, if ever, to my knowledge, shown on UK Gold or mainstream BBC.

I had enjoyed the glimpses of this era in the later stories such as 'Mawdryn Undead' and Patrick Troughton in the Multi Doctor Adventures he appeared in always enthralled me, but I really wanted to see him and William in their own times as it were.

As the audio releases of 'lost stories' came out I snapped them up. Then I finally saw a Hartnell story. 'The Time Meddler'. What a wonderful two hours of TV it was. I adored it. and wanted more!

When my mum went on a trip to London, I begged her to buy me a black and white Doctor Who video and she did. She brought back 'An Unearthly Child'.

I watched it that night and that first episode just transfixed me, as I know it did to viewers in 1963. I had fallen in love with this era.

 

The DVD releases have steadily come out over the last few years and I have always been keener to get one if it is an unseen (to me) black and white story.

Across the special features of the DVDs I already had there were often clips of the Hartnell/Troughton era, and to sit and watch a full, never seen before story (to me) is always a pleasure and a joy. Even in 2013 I'm still discovering these black and white Doctor Who adventures.

To see again a black and white story broadcast all those years ago. There is always something so magical about them. It saddens me to see modern day Doctor Who fans ignore these classics despite clips and images used in the current series. William Hartnell was in the first Matt Smith series four times! So I say embrace them. These stories are the groundwork for the modern episodes we see today. I understand to some used to the fast paced, over in 45 minutes series, that these black and white stories are slower and can take up to three hours to tell.

But don't ignore them. Some of the best stories and most remembered cliffhangers of Who history are there. It is no less shocking to see the Doctor or a companion in danger, or the reveal of a monster in simple black and white. The Dalek rising from the Thames or the Cybermen breaking out from their tombs would not be half as scary in colour.

 

So the next time you get the chance to watch a Doctor Who, give a classic black and white story another chance. The magic of the police box with the most beautiful, timeless and iconic inside is no less wonderful in monochrome.

Join the journey from a junkyard in London 1963 to our hero forced by his own people into changing. You never know. You might find yourself a gem or two. I did.

Neil Baird, 2012

 

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For more stories on how Doctor Who can change lives, check out these links:

 

- Thank You Doctor Who!

 

- How I Became a Doctor Who Fan

 

Everything I Learned In life, I Got From Doctor Who:

- #1 Talk To Strangers

- #2 Tea Is The Best

- #3 Be Yourself

- #4 Eat Jelly Babies

 

 

LORDI - The Riff

So, Lordi's latest album, 'To Beast or Not To Beast', hit the shelves last week, and now we have a fantastic new video from them, for their first single, 'The Riff'.

The video bears absolutely no relation to the song lyrics at all, centering around a half-naked woman shopping for toilet roll, in a supermarket crawling with zombies. Lordi themselves are performing in the supermarket in a ring of bog roll, while behind the scenes a bizarre chef man-handles bloody body parts.

It's a great video because it shows just how little Lordi care about the general opinion of their band. They aren't afraid to do a video that is so silly it's bordering on self-parody, whilst at the same time featuring much more blood than ever before in a Lordi music video.

It also has the heroine of the piece decapitating a zombie with a shopping basket, containing - yes, you guessed it - a roll of toilet paper.

As much as I enjoyed their feature-length 'Dark Floors' movie, I can't help but wonder if Lordi's film would have been much more fun with this level of randomness!

Enjoy....